Regardless of Outcome, There are no Wrong Decisions

Many of us have a hard time making decisions. We fear that if we choose the wrong partner, then we’ll be stuck in an unhappy relationship. Or, if we make the wrong financial decision, we’ll make a bad investment. Yet, there are no wrong decisions. Perhaps we could, at times, make different choices regarding our relationships, personal pursuits, careers, or the right color of paint we should buy for our bedroom. Yet, regardless of the outcome, we always gain valuable experience or insights from any choice we make. Making a decision is always better than making no decision at all. At least we had the courage to decide, take a chance, and make a move in a particular direction. We can’t take action unless we make a decision first. And, a decision is never wrong because we always gain something from it – whether we get what we thought we intended or learn a valuable lesson. Sometimes, we need to follow through on a decision to realize that we don’t really want what we thought we did. For instance, maybe you always wanted to live in a big city, so you leave family, friends, and a secure job in a small town to move across the country. However, once you get there, you find out that you don’t really like city life. You never could have known that unless you tried it. So, you move back home, all the more appreciative of small town living. Rather than constantly wondering what else is out there, you are now able to fully embrace your surroundings and the direction your life there is taking. Your decision to move to the city did work out - just not in the way that you envisioned. While our decisions may not always lead us to what we thought we wanted, we always end up with what will ultimately make us happiest. Being able to make decisions is one of life’s privileges. Exercise your right to fearlessly decide.

The One Who Got Away

In your life you’ll make note of a lot of people. Ones with whom you shared something special, ones who will always mean something. There’s the one you first kissed, the one you first loved, the one you lost your virginity to, the one you put on a pedestal, the one you’re with and the one who got away.

The one who got away is the person with whom everything was great, everything was perfect, but the timing was just wrong. There was no fault in the person, no flaws in the chemistry but the cards just didn’t fall the right way, I suppose. 

 

I believe in the fact that ending up with someone, finding a longtime partner that is, does not lie merely in the other person. I can actually argue that an equal part, or maybe even the greater part, has to do with the matter of timing. It has to do with you being ready to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes beyond the little niceties of giddy romance.

How often have you gone through it without even realizing it? When you’re not ready to commit in that mature manner, it doesn’t matter who you’re with, it just doesn’t work. Small problems become big, inconsequential become deal-breakers simply because you’re not ready and it shows. It’s not that you and the person you’re with are no good. It’s just that it’s not yet right and little things become the flashpoint of that fact. Then one day you’re ready. You are now. And when this happens you’ll be ready to settle down with someone. This person may not be the most perfect. Or might not be the brightest star of romance to ever have burned in your life but it’ll work because you’re ready. It’ll work because it’s the right time and you’ll make it work. And it’ll make sense, it really will.

So that day comes when you’re finally making sense of things and you find yourself to be a different person. Things are different, your approach is different, you finally understand who you are and what you want and you’ve become ready because the time has truly arrived. And mind you, there’s no telling when this day will come. Hopefully you’re single but you could be in a long-term relationship, you could be married with three kids, it doesn’t matter. All you know is that you’ve changed, and for some reason, the one who got away is the first person you think about.

You’ll think about them because you’ll wonder, "What if they were here today?" You’ll wonder, "What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?" That’s what the one who got away is.

The biggest "What if?" you’ll have in your life. If you’re already with a partner, you’ll just have to accept the fact that the one who got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy tale you think your love story is, this can happen to the best of us. But hopefully you’re mature enough to realize that you’re already with the one you’re with and this is just another test of your commitment, one which will just strengthen your relationship when you get past it. 

 

Sure, you’ll think about him/her every so often, but it’s alright. It’s never nice to live with a "might have been" but it happens. Maybe the one who got away is the one who’s already with someone; in which case it’s the same thing. You just have to accept and know that your memories of that person will probably bring a nice little smile to your lips in the future when you’re old and gray and reminiscing. But if neither of that is the case, then it’s different. What do you do if it’s not yet too late? Simple…find him, find her. Because the very existence of a "one who got away" means that you’ll always wonder, what if you got that one. Ask him out to coffee; ask her out to a movie, it doesn’t matter if you’ve dropped in from out of nowhere. You’d be surprised you just might be "the one who got away" as well for that person. You might drop in from out of nowhere and it won’t make a difference. If the timing is finally right, it’ll all just fall into place somehow and in the end, it would be a great feeling to be able to say to someone, "Hey you, you’re the one who almost got away." I should know, because I have.

I'm Back!

After a long break, I’m back blogging again; had to ditch my old blog though. I find my old blog gloomy and dark. I remember, I wrote something there about a friend’s attempt of killing himself. No wonder it brought me negative atmosphere and made me wrote nothing about but my rants. How I hated my job, my life and other people. This madness has to stop. It's about time that I look at life at a different perspective. I need to change. Choose my feelings wisely. Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.